Stupid Climb.

It was one early morning when I decided to go mountain climbing. I called the center at Kota Kinabalu and asked if I could book a time. They said that they would be free from 2pm and that there were a lot of people, but I was okay with it and agreed with the planning. I quickly ate a packet of Chipsmore cookies that I had left in the freezer for about 2 months in case of emergency, then quickly took a bus ride to the nearest jetty in east Malaysia. But the only boat available was a ferry so it took me about 4 hours, so I couldn't see anything else, and by the time I got to the Mt. Kinabalu place it was 2.30 pm and raining. Luckily the other people were still waiting there, and I insisted on going, so we did. Halfway up I got stuck to a tree and couldn't get out for the next few hours since everyone else wanted to go up first, so I was left there to starve and get even more soaked with the now banjir-causing rain. When they finally came down I had gotten out of the tree myself and was now at the top of Mt. Kinabalu, which unfortunately did not have snow anymore thanks to global warming. The End.

Pier Pressure

DJ Fatboy not so Slim threw a party and only 1 reveller came ( but he went back home since there was no one there ) . He was all alone eating Ramli burgers by the seaside. Then, his friend, DJ Slimboy not so Fat came with some chapaties. Suddenly, an officer named Chief Inspector Not Fat Not Slim came and asked whether they are still hungry. So DJ Fatboy not so slim, DJ Slimboy not so fat and Chief Inspector Not Fat Not Slim went to Burger King. That means ah get fat, no more slim.

Come on people :)

UPDATEEEE!

yes im spamming everywhere with my super awesome essay. kthanksbye.

Dear sir,

I went to your "Lookout Mountain" and I had to LOOK for your mountain. I went there with high hopes but I came back with low hopes. Your "mountain" is so beautiful, I saw your Proton Saga behind the projector ( P.S. : you should really get a new car ).

My friend, Ali, who is a professional hiker almost died after climbing your mountain. Your "pilots" were sitting in the Proton Saga behind the projector rolling chapaties with their "hangs".

Therefore, I want my money back. You have to pay for the petrol of my car. KMA! CEH! We took 12 hours to find your stupid mountains. First, we drove to Singapore. Then, we kayaked to Fuckhet. On the way, we stopped at Bangcock to see some peacocks. Finally, we reached at your "oh-so-called lookout mountains".

Thank you for your cheap time. At least you know that I am still alive but you better pray for me. I got food poisoning from eating your chapaties and I broke all my bones. Now, I am like a snake and I will bite you.

I couldn't help it. XD

The constant battle between Coke and Pepsi

School Life: Me, My MacBook and My Charger

  Yesterday was a very interesting day. The chicken rice lady fainted when I insisted for the tenth time that I wanted Siew Yoke Fan. But that's not the story. Anyways, someone started a fire in school, and I still can't think of anyone who would do something like that. It went something like this:

  

  I was getting very bored during Literature class, because the teacher is very boring. So when she finally said in her indian accent, "Oh-kayy kelarss (class), yoo all can take out yorr machboooooks and start rrrreading dis poemm on dis webbsite", we immediately took out our computers and started unblocking sites like facebook etc.

  That was when I realized that my macbook had no battery, and I was sitting in the middle of the classroom, where there was no power-point to plug in my charger. But luckily, I had brought my extra-long wire, so I pulled out some idiot's charger from the plug at the back, and plugged in my own, dragging the long wire across the many bags and pieces of paper strewn across the floor. Finally I plugged it into my computer, sighed a sigh of relief, and began unblocking facebook.

  About halfway through class, (it was a double-period), I smelled something burning. I turned around, and saw that a piece of paper near my charger was on fire. I did not want everyone to panic, because that would be horrible, so I calmly spoke right across the classroom in a loud, clear voice, clearly addressing the Literature teacher, "Teacher, there's a fire at the back of the classroom. Do you think we could make smores?"

  And that was when the stupid annoying girl in my class yelled, "FIIIIIREEEEE!!!!" What a stupid girl! I was talking to the teacher, not her! Why did she have to amplify the fact?! Now I would never get to make my smores.

  I sat back and watched then as student after student screamed, while the teacher started cursing in Hindu and screamed as well. The whole class was running amok, so I took it into my own hands to make everyone settle down:

  "QUIEETT!" I yelled.

  To my surprise, everyone stood still and stared at me.

  "Guess what? There's an even BIGGER fire on the floor above us, so we don't have to worry about this small one in our class. Ain't that great??" I said.

  

  They burst into screams again, this time exclaiming things like, "WE'RE ALL GONNA DIEE" or "I DONT WANNA DIE YOUNG!" or "WHY HAVE THE GODS DONE THIS TO US!?". Tsk, whiners.

  I shook my head and sighed, then glanced around to see how big the fire was getting. It was now up to the window, and everyone's bags (except mine, thankfully, because it was with me) was on fire now, too. In their panicked state, the students had thrown their books and paper up in the air, and the books and papers had fallen into the flames, making it even bigger.

  The class next door had come over to see what all the screaming was about, and when they saw what was happening they started screaming as well. Can you just imagine the noise!? My poor ears!

  Finally someone had the sense to go and call the disciplinary teacher, Mrs Ganesh. (Yes, also indian.)

  "VAT IS GOING ON HERE? YOU STUPID STUDENTS ALWAYS-- AAAH FIIIREEE!!!" she yelled.

  She ran outside, and called the fire department. Then she warned all the other teachers to take all the students out of the building. I followed them, and realized that the screams were turning into cheers, because apparently the school day was going to be cut short due to the fire.

  In about 10 minutes, the fire brigade arrived, and managed to put out the raging flames. No one was hurt, unfortunately.

  The next day, back at school, there was an assembly, and the principle said that the fire had been caused by a student who had pulled a charger across bags and papers on the classroom floor, and therefore the heat and radiation from the charger had ignited the papers. But they did not know which student had done it.

  I shook my head, thinking how stupid the person was. I mean, who in their right mind would drag a charger across flammable objects on the floor, right? Sometimes there can be such stupid people at my school. I can't wait to see what will happen tomorrow!

Vocabulary: Wordbuilding Activity 5 (without corrections) XD

TIME TO REVIVE.
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I have some very please memories of my child. We live in a romance cottage in the country with love view of Lake Windermere. We had a wonder garden lots of animals. However, I memory one year extreme well. I was eight and one of my favour animals was a goose called Mabel. After coming back from school, I used to food Mabel. With me, she was usual very quiet and friend. With everybody else though, Mabel was very nasty and aggression. That winter was very cold and the snow was nearly a metre depth. On Christmas Day, we had a tradition lunch - goose and Christmas pudding. I was cheer until I realised that the goose was Mabel! My happy immediately disappeared and I spent the rest of the meal in tears.



sad story but unfortunately my sister and I couldn't stop laughing when I read it out. thank goodness there was no skype video/audio chat going on. XD

from the yr 9 english textbook, pg. 7 :P